Walking in the Valley A weekly column for those who live and walk in Silicon Valley by Barbara Dahlgren

Too Much Realism Column for the week of May 2-8, 2004

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Television sitcoms of the past gave us the stay at home mom role model. Unrealistic? Perhaps. Not every woman did housework in heels and pearls like June Cleaver (Leave It to Beaver) but women like Harriet Nelson (The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet), Betty Anderson (Father Knows Best), Donna Stone (The Donna Reed Show), and Fonzi’s “Mrs. C” (Happy Days) did set stellar examples of keeping the home fires burning.

These women were not without controversy. Believe it or not, I still remember when Laura Petrie (The Dick Van Dyke Show) caused quite a stir by viewers when she wore Capri pants to do housework.

Eventually the working mom came on the scene. We had Elise Keaton (Family Ties), Clair Huxtable (The Cosby Show), and Roseanne Connor (Roseanne). And working single moms did their part to hold their families together (Good Times, Kate and Allie, Julia, One Day at a Time).

There was an uproar when Murphy Brown chose to have a baby without a father. The baby had a sire but not a father. She claimed she was a modern woman making a real choice. Today, realism is the “in” thing in television. So much so that every other program seems to be a reality show.

The latest offshoot is a segment of 20/20 called “Be My Baby” hosted by Barbara Walters where a high school sophomore, 16 year old Jessica, chooses which of 5 couples will get to adopt her baby. It’s only “fitting” I suppose that this is slated to air the week before Mother’s Day. There is something almost perverse about the timing.

20/20 would have us believe this is a documentary but that’s not what the promos indicate. One of the prospective fathers likened it to the “Bachelorette” and Jessica states, “I was basically deciding whether they would have children or not. I was kind of playing God.” This isn’t some made for TV movie. These are real people.

Now there’s an oxymoron for you...real people. Where are the real people? I guess they’re on TV. This desire everyday people have to be on the boob tube perplexes me. Viewers gaze at them spilling their guts to Oprah and Dr. Phil, punching their neighbors on Springer, exposing their ta-tas on Howard Stern, and seeking wise counsel from Riki Lake who is more than qualified to help people. After all, she is a TV show host.

I can understand people seeking fame and fortune on American Idol, which is based on talent. I can remotely understand people wanting to be on survivor even though it’s not my idea of entertainment. I can even see someone wanting to marry a millionaire or be Donald Trump’s apprentice. Although why you want to apprentice with someone who is more schmoozer and hustler than businessman is beyond me. Oh, yeah! I forgot. That’s what big business is all about today. Anyway, I feel it reaches a new low when we have a television competition with a baby as the prize for the pleasure of the viewing audience.

What’s next? Maybe we can raffle off a child for adoption. All qualified parents can go through a screening process, buy a ticket, and then we can watch some TV personality, perhaps Jessica Simpson, draw the lucky winning number out of a diaper pail. Or we can have qualified parents bid on a baby like an auction. Or we can have a baby lottery. In the future it will be easier to remain detached when we use test tube babies or baby clones.

I think this program makes Laura’s slacks and Murphy’s decision to raise a child alone pale in comparison. As far as I’m concerned, if “Be My Baby” is the new trend in reality TV, you can have it. I’d rather watch unrealistic reruns. The standards seem much higher.

Be sure to visit this page every week to read the next edition of Walking in the Valley. You can write to the author at bdahlgren@wcgsouthbay.org.