Walking in the Valley A bi-weekly column, featuring one Silicon Valley Christian's (a)musings on life's journey by Barbara Dahlgren

Read Thoroughly Before Signing Column for the weeks of June 1-15, 2009

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Senior Tyler Frost has attended Heritage Christian School in Findlay, Ohio since kindergarten.  This private fundamentalist Baptist school requires 7th to 12th grade students and parents to read the school handbook and sign a statement agreeing to follow the policies stated there in.  It doesn’t say you have to agree with them, but that you will abide by them.  One such policy forbids dancing, rock music, hand holding and kissing.

Tyler Frost’s girlfriend Rebecca Smoody is a senior at Findlay High School, so naturally Tyler wanted to take her to her prom.  In order to do this, he had to get his principal to sign a form from Findlay High stating that he was a student in good standing at his school.  This standard form was basically a “school safety slip” designed to keep disruptive kids from attending the prom.  Frost’s principal signed the form after pointing out to Frost that attending this prom was in direct disagreement with Heritage’s handbook and the statement Frost signed agreeing to follow the school policies. Disciplinary action would result.

A Heritage Christian School committee decided that if Frost attended this prom, he would be suspended.  He would receive an “incomplete” on his assignments and not be allowed to attend any graduation ceremonies with his class.  He would, however, receive his diploma once he completed his final exams.

Frost decided to let his conscience (or hormones) be his guide, take his girlfriend to the prom, and suffer the consequences.  He said, “It was worth it.”  Frost doesn’t have any regrets.  He appreciates the morals and principles he’s learned at Heritage School, but doesn’t feel like less of a Christian for attending the prom.

It didn’t take long for the media blitz to pick up on this newsworthy tidbit, hone in on this little community, and put Findlay, Ohio on the map.  Until then, few people knew where Findlay was, and fewer cared.  Who knew that “The Old Mill Stream” was written by a guy fishing in Findlay or that for three months in 1960 it was the only place in the world where touch tone telephone service was available?  Not much seems to happen in Findlay.

Local newspapers ran the story.  Findlay’s newspaper The Courier printed a photo of Tyler kissing his girlfriend Rebecca in a parking lot across from Heritage School.  Toledo’s KISS FM 92.5 broadcast its morning show at Heritage Christian School.  Toledo and Cleveland TV stations interviewed him.  CBS’ The Early Show flew Tyler and his stepfather to New York and aired a segment with them.  They were asked to appear on Inside Edition and ABC’s Primetime.  The incident has been mentioned on every major news web site including Fox News, Yahoo, and AOL News.

And of course this little story has become fodder for bloggers everywhere.  So many comparisons to the old movie “Footloose” have been mentioned that one would think they are doing a remake of the movie.  Oh, that’s right – they are!  Can Kevin Bacon save Heritage Christian School?  Not unless John Lithgow becomes principal!

Bloggers want to emphasize how unfair Heritage School is.  After all, there is no real crime so they feel the punishment is too severe.  In an unofficial poll of over 200,000 users of aol.com, 91 percent said “thumbs down” to Heritage’s decision to suspend Frost.  They don’t consider dancing evil or immoral.  Isn’t Heritage showing a double standard?  Are they going to suspend everyone who listens to rock music?  Would there be anyone left in the school?  They feel Heritage’s Christian philosophies are archaic, narrow minded, and misguided.  Some don’t think this agreement Frost signed should apply off his school campus.  Yet others point out that those who play high school sports know all too well that school athletes are required to abide by certain guidelines on and off their school campus.

There is nothing quite as exciting as “Christians” sharing their point of view.  Hell hath no fury like a Christian with an uncompromising opinion.

Heritage refuses to relent.  Their web site cites Joseph’s example of fleeing temptation and scriptures like Proverbs 4:23 (Keep your heart with all diligence for out of it are the issues of life) and 2 Timothy 2:22 (Flee also youthful lusts but follow after righteousness faith charity and peace with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart) to back up their point of view.  Granted, it’s a weak argument, but that’s their story and they are sticking to it. However I will commend them for saying, “when discussing this particular issue with folks in the community please remember that the servant of the Lord must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness (2 Timothy 2:24, 25).”

 From a legal point of view, Heritage was within its rights to enforce rules as they saw fit.  It was lawful – perhaps not expedient, but lawful.  After all, Tyler and his parents carelessly signed an agreement they obviously did not believe in.  They wanted their children to go to a Christian School and the one they chose required them to sign this particular agreement.  Signing the agreement is one of the prices they paid for the privilege of attending a certain Christian school.  The gained the Christian education they wanted, but forfeited dances.  Life is a trade off.

As for Tyler Frost, I commend him for considering his options and making a decision he believed in.   He weighed all the facts, yet decided to go against the system.  He decided the Kingdom of God was not about meat or drink, dancing or not dancing.   Suffering media attention and the consequences of the school’s ruling are the prices he paid.  Life is a trade off.

These are life lessons Tyler Frost will always remember:  The media is not your friend and life is a trade off.   And you can bet that neither Tyler nor his parents will ever sign another agreement without reading the fine print and counting the cost.

Be sure to visit this page often to read the next edition of Walking in the Valley. You can write to the author at bdahlgren@wcgsouthbay.org.