Walking in the Valley A weekly column for those who live and walk in Silicon Valley by Barbara Dahlgren

Finger Faux Pas Column for the weeks of June 1-15, 2005

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The “Wendy’s Finger” story didn’t start on April Fool’s Day but close enough. On March 22, Las Vegas resident, Anna Ayala, was eating chili at a San Jose Wendy’s fast food restaurant when she claimed to bite into a human fingertip, giving new meaning to the term “finger food.” (And we thought it was the beef that gave it the flavor!) The police took the suspicious digit as evidence. It was ascertained that yes, indeed, it was a well manicured finger about an inch and a half long. The headlines and newsprint stories ran rampant.

Ayala hires an attorney. Wendy’s offers a $50,000 reward for reliable info about the finger. Police continue investigations. Possible link to a finger bitten off by a pet leopard in Nevada is announced. Wendy’s claim sales in Bay Area drop 30 to 50%. Ayala decides not to pursue legal action. No link found from leopard lead. Wendy’s increases reward to $100,000. Bay Area Wendy’s workers have to be laid off because of falling sales. Ayala is arrested. Finger believed to be a hoax.

Copycat hoaxsters, lacking originality (and brains), have placed about 20 complaints at Wendy’s restaurants the past month. They claim to have found wood, an acrylic fingernail, and other things too gross to mention in their food. I’m sure those complaints have fallen since Ayala’s arrest.

Hoaxes are not a new phenomenon. Here are a couple of moldy oldies:

The Emperor Constantine I of Rome supposedly deeded a big portion of Western Europe to Pope Sylvester I in appreciation for curing his leprosy. The Vatican used this document, “Donation of Constantine,” for territorial claims until 1929 even though Constantine never had leprosy and it was a known forgery made 400 years after Constantine died in 750 A.D.

In 1860 “The Holy Stones” were found by an amateur archaeologist in the Hopewell Indian mounds at Newark, Ohio. One stone had a carved man and Hebrew inscriptions, a condensed version of the 10 Commandments. Unfortunately, although well crafted, the stones contained Hebrew misspellings. Believe it or not, debates still abound over their authenticity.

The Internet and especially e-mail are froth with hoaxes. Here are a few I’ve received recently:

Tommy Dorsey wrote “Take My Hand, Precious Lord,” while he was on a gig in St. Louis after learning that his wife died giving birth to their son, who died 2 days later. It’s true. However, it wasn’t the famous band leader of the 40s which the info seems to imply. It was Rev. Thomas Dorsey, the father of gospel music, a black preacher, composer, and choir leader who is considered the most influential figure in this musical genre.

A professor tried to prove there was no God by using the argument, “If God created everything, then God created evil since evil exists. Yada, yada…” So if God did exist, which he doesn’t, he would be evil. But one student debunked that by telling the professor that cold or darkness couldn’t exist using that kind of reasoning. Cold wouldn’t exist because it would just be the absence of heat. Darkness wouldn’t exist because it would just be the absence of light. Then he goes on to prove that evil would have to be the absence of God, therefore God must exist. And that student was….Albert Einstein. What a great story! I’m not sure I fully understand it, but hey…what a great story! Unfortunately, Al didn’t do this.

The very poignant, moving “Paradox of Our Time” was written by a student who witnessed the Columbine shootings or better yet, George Carlin after his wife died. Neither is true. You can tell Carlin didn’t write it because it has no curse words. In fact Carlin goes so far as to say on his website, “ One of the more embarrassing items making the internet/e-mail rounds is a sappy load of $!@# called ‘The Paradox of Our Time.’ The main problem I have with it is that as true as some of the expressed sentiments may be, who really gives a $!@#? Certainly not me!”

Newspapers have always carried their share of hoaxes:

A New York Times headline read “Darwin Theory is Proved True” in 1912. An amateur paleontologist found skull fragments in England proving men and apes had a common ancestor. He was called the “Piltdown Man.” It wasn’t until 1953 that scientists finally abandoned the premise when new dating methods found the fragments came from different periods of time and were chemically aged to match.

In the early 1900s, newspapers worldwide ran the story of Hans, the German horse (move over Mr. Ed) who was able to count, spell, and do math. A committee of experts concluded that Hans’s calculations were real and not a result of cheating. However, one tenacious scientist investigated more thoroughly. He found when Hans’s master, von Osten, knew the answer, so did the horse. When von Osten didn’t know the answer, neither did the horse. Hans’s great insight (or perhaps “horse sense”) came not in mathematical equations but in his ability to detect slight movements in his trainer to know how to respond.

We laugh, of course, but how susceptible are we to what we read or hear? For some reason, if we see it in print, we assume it’s true.

I don’t want to burst anyone’s bubble but NASA scientists never discovered a lost day in time that coincides with the book of Joshua in the Bible, a tooth left in a glass of Coca-Cola will not dissolve overnight, Bill Gates didn’t author a list of “Rules Kids Won't Learn in School,” and Anna Ayala didn’t find a finger in a bowl of chili at a Wendy’s in San Jose, CA.

Be sure to visit this page often to read the next edition of Walking in the Valley. You can write to the author at bdahlgren@wcgsouthbay.org.